I love ‘Snog, Marry, Avoid?‘ If you’ve never seen it it’s pretty much a show where a computer called POD judges girls who like attention and gives them weird ‘make-unders’. They take glittery girls with too many hair extensions, 3 sets of false lashes and an orangey glow and make them look like schoolteachers. I assume that the point is to show them that they’re actually really pretty and they don’t need to go out in nothing but masking tape on their nipples to get attention. The problem is that some of them really do.
Why shouldn’t unfortunate looking people be allowed to fool the world into thinking they’re the hottest thing in town? Having your face washed, a wig forced onto your head (They ALWAYS put them in wigs) and wearing something your Nan would laugh at won’t make you feel better about yourself.
They ask people on the street and sometimes celebrities, like Karl from Neighbours to decide if they wanted to ‘snog, marry or avoid’ the girls. They usually always say avoid. It’s a massive fib. On a night out men don’t think about what she’ll look like in the morning, with a false eyelash stuck to her cheek, or the effect fake tan will have on their sheets. They see hot girls with lots of flesh on display, all lovely with long hair and made up faces. No one believes that they’d really avoid them. I don’t know why they lie.
I think probably the worst, or maybe the best part of the show (for me at least) is the weird effect on me. I see the nice orange ladies with the boobs and the hair, and then I look at myself, in Barbie PJs with eyeliner half rubbed off. I nearly always reach for a bottle of fake tan and my make-up bag, then spend the next few hours making myself up like the Barbie I wish I were. I don’t think I’m on my own with this either, they always show great videos of them on nights out, mad drunk having the time of their lives. It’s not a great ad for the natural look.
It’s only in the morning when my pillows are stained with St. Tropez and my hair is matted I realize I can’t face the effort. But if they’re willing to get up three hours before they even need to be anywhere and spend a week getting ready for a night out then their efforts should be celebrated. Don’t listen to the stupid purple computer.
I LOVE YOU SNOG MARRY AVOID ‘BEFORE’ GIRLS!!